In a few hours I will be 38. Thirty-freakin-eight. Two years shy of (God help me) FORTY. That scares the bejesus out of me. But it doesn't have to.
Up until a few years ago, I managed to spit in the eye of my good genes. I treated myself like total crap by not exercising and eating gobs and gobs of unhealthy food. And now it shows. In the past 6 years I've gained 70 pounds. Wow. Seriously. Wow. Seeing this in print is giving me heart palpitations. Regardless, it has to be said, because I don't know how else to wake myself up from the self-loathing I've been putting myself through.
Why are so many of us, especially women, so unkind to ourselves? Why do I stress about my children eating healthy foods and then I hit the McDonald's drive-thru? Don't answer that. I know why.
On the eve of my 38th birthday, I'm giving myself a present:
- I vow to love myself.
- I vow to be kind to myself.
- I vow to make some life changes in order to be healthy.
I'll keep you posted. Who knows? Perhaps that fresh-faced girl will show up in my mirror again.